"I'm so sorry"

That's the phrase no one wants to hear, especially from your OBGYN. That moment you hear the phrase, nothing is the same. Everything changes in the blink of a moment. One minute you're pregnant and thriving. The next, you're mourning the loss of your baby.

Miscarriage is a club no woman every wants to belong in, yet it's one that involves so many of us. 

My Miscarriage
It will go without saying that this will be triggering, though you could argue that the entire blog is triggering. That's a story for a different day. 

In September 2020, I found out that I was pregnant with #3. We had spent more than a decade trying for a third child, but it just never happened. Well, it didn't happen until September. 

Unfortunately, I joined the miscarriage club in early November. My doctor uttered "I'm so sorry" as we failed to find a heartbeat on what had been a wiggly baby the week before. 

When everyone else was talking about election fraud and who really was elected president, I was in mourning. A D&C was required, and recovery could begin. 

I'm not alone in saying that we were so heartbroken. It's an interesting mental place to be in - I knew that this baby likely had a medical issue that made it incompatible with life. This baby had a purpose, and that purpose was fulfilled. Even so, it's not the ending I wanted. I wanted to plan the nursery or get excited for the next ultrasound. 

Why this blog
Everyone mourns differently, and I discovered quickly that forums were no support. The women who were just dealt their first miscarriage were looking for guidance on what's normal or not, and other women who had multiple miscarriages under their belts weren't necessarily helpful. 

Everything I wanted to know was what other women wanted to know, but Google was of no help. Forums weren't helpful. So why not make it myself?

I'm not a doctor nor do I plan to be. However, I ask questions and seek answers from experts who know far more than I. Whether you're interesting in learning about the realities of having a D&C surgery or managing life after miscarriage, this one's for you.